Monday, April 11, 2011

how to be the best postpartum visitor

I found this blog. 
Im not sure where - but this is a wonderful post!


Have a friend who had a baby and you're on the roster to drop off a meal?  Here's everything they want you to know and do, but are too shy and polite to say and ask.  

They are tired.  Breastfeeding is still awkward and having people around makes it more awkward. The mother is recovering physically, either from a surgical birth, or from the equivalent of a triathlon where the prize was a grapefuit sized head flying out of her vagina.  Either of these things makes you sore and tired. They would like to see you, but don't want to be tired out by a long visit.  You are not going to stay longer than 15 minutes, no matter how polite the parents are in saying you can stay  longer. If your visit/meal drop off scheduled for 5.30. BE ON TIME.   Make plans for 6:15 so that you HAVE to leave.

Before you walk in the door, put your game face on.  Set a timer, on your phone or watch for 15 minutes. When it goes off, get out of there! Remember that you are going to be a quiet, productive blessing.  This visit is NOT about you.  It is not about the parents hosting you and putting on a cup of tea so you can sit and visit and hold the baby. Think about how you would feel if you had either had surgery or ran a triathlon.  What would you want people to do for you?  This visit is about blessing the parents and making their life a little bit easier.  Your prize is getting a quick peek at the cute new human.

Here's how to play out your 15 minute visit:
1.  Bring a healthy meal. Include a salad or fresh vegetables.  Only use disposable dishes. There is nothing more annoying than 
         a) having to wash more dishes when you have a new baby 
         b) having to try to return dishes to all sorts of random people when you have a new baby
2.  In addition to your meal, bring cut up veggies and fruit, unsalted trail mix or nuts, or other such healthy snacks for daytime munching for mom to eat while she's nursing.

Read more:

Now be sure to click over and read the rest!!

There are more great ideas in the comments. 

I have a few friends expecting babies over the next few months and this is great advice to pass on to them.
I know I appreciated it.


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